Showing posts with label forgiveness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label forgiveness. Show all posts

Saturday, June 17, 2017

Conflict Redeemed



As a pastor, one of the most critical parts of my job is to help people work through conflict.  Not that I’m always successful.  I am aware of relationships in our community where there is so much hurt and mistrust, and the conflicted parties are so deeply entrenched in their positions, that the most they can manage for each other is avoidance, and when needed, a chilly civility.   And there are questions that touch on our common life, where there are differences of opinion so pronounced, that we prefer not to talk about them.  We have to admit that it is a fact of life that, as the educator Parker Palmer once put it, “community is where you find the person you least want to live with,” and maybe the best we can hope for is to keep such conflicts from flaring into open hostility.  But the resurrection of Jesus offers a better hope than that. 
The story of Jesus is, after all, a story of conflict.  And at time of the Passover, the annual celebration of God’s decisive victory over the oppressors of the people, Jesus took the conflict to Jerusalem.  He brought his challenge to the chief priests, the elders, and the scribes, right into the heart of their stronghold—into the temple.  The gospels tell how as Jesus was teaching in the temple the ruling elite sent one representative after another to spar with him verbally, to try to back him down or trip him up--and how every time, their attacks blew back in their faces. 
Because Jesus turned each loaded question and devious insinuation into a subtle but devastating indictment of his opponents, of their cowardice, injustice and hypocrisy, their complicity with violence and idolatrous religion.  And with each of these encounters the crowd of on-lookers and their enthusiasm for Jesus and his teaching grew.  Until, fearing a total public relations disaster, no one dared ask him any more questions.
But the conflict didn’t end there.  Unable to take Jesus down publicly, the temple elite did what the powerful often do when they have lost their moral and political legitimacy.   They resorted to treachery and violence.   You know the story very well: how at supper Jesus told his disciples that one of them, his closest friends, would betray him to his death; how Judas Iscariot went out into the night, only to return later, leading the temple goons to the garden where Jesus used to go to pray; how he singled him out for them with a kiss.   You know how Jesus refused to fight, or to let his disciples fight for him, and how they scattered and fled as he was dragged away; how Peter followed, but when he was confronted, denied that he knew Jesus, not once, but three times.
You know this story so there’d really be no need to retell it if it were not for the fact that with the coming of Easter, that story so often disappears.  It is forgotten immediately, as if, in raising Jesus from the dead, God made the conflicts that led to his death irrelevant, or miraculously resolved them.   But such radical discontinuity between Holy Week and Easter is far from biblical.  Just look at Peter’s sermon in the Second Chapter of Acts.  It is a bold declaration that God has set Jesus of Nazareth free from the power of death, but it begins with an equally bold reminder to “you, my fellow Israelites,” that “you crucified this man, whom God attested to you with deeds of power, wonders, and signs, by the hands of those outside the law.” 
The Acts of the Apostles tells how the conflict that marked Jesus’ life and death doesn’t end with his rising from the dead, which itself only serves to prove that the conflict runs deeper, and its stakes are higher, than anyone previously thought.  In the resurrection, God’s Holy Spirit not only vindicates Jesus’ movement to renew Israel by a prophetic insurrection from below.  She also gives unprecedented power and universal scope to that movement, so that it breaks out across the world to challenge every “religion” that gives ideological cover to systems of exclusion and domination, and confronts the idols of the nations in the name of Israel’s God of creation, justice, healing and love.
But the Gospel of John tells us that before that can happen, the risen Christ has to reconcile his own community of disciples.  It is a traumatized community, not only because of the horrifying death of the teacher in whom they had placed such hope, but because the treachery of the ostensible leaders of their nation.  And one of their own inner circle aided and abetted that treachery, which they all passively acquiesced to out of fear.  That same fear still gripped them as they gathered for the evening meal on the first day of the week, and though one of them had not arrived, they locked the doors.  Who knows what premonitions of further betrayal haunted their minds as they thought of Thomas the Twin, out there somewhere as darkness fell on the city, doing who knows what, with who knows whom?
It is into the middle of this threatened little circle that the Lord came, bringing his peace.  He showed them the marks of betrayal on his body, and again said “Peace be with you.”  And they would need that peace when Thomas arrived.  We are used to thinking of Thomas as the one who doubted God, but it was not God whom Thomas doubted—it was his friends.  Maybe in the aftermath of seeing Jesus they were full of love and joy, and disbelief that they had ever doubted Thomas, but to him they seemed to be in the grip of a kind of group delusion.  Maybe he questioned why they would say that the Lord come to them when he was not there—what kind of game were they playing, and why didn’t it include him? 
My point is that we don’t know how Thomas’ doubt might have divided this already frail community, if the others had not received the Spirit of peace?  This peace is not simply an inner feeling.  It is an active power, the power to forgive.  The spiritual power of forgiveness, flowing from the crucified and risen Christ, is what breathed new life into the community of Jesus’ disciples, as it has ever since, again and again and again.  It is the power in which we are sent, as Jesus was sent, into inevitable conflict, to speak the word of God’s peace. 
It is also the power of discernment, because forgiveness can never be automatic.  It must be free, a decision given and received with eyes that see clearly the wounds that sin has made in the body of God.   But our standard of judgment must be Jesus himself: Jesus, who said “judge not, lest you be judged;” Jesus, who preferred agony on the cross to violence against those who misjudged him; Jesus, who sat down at supper with the one he knew would betray him and gave him bread and said, “this is my body, given for you.” 
Such forgiveness is hard to achieve, but simple to understand.  You just have to hold out your hand.  We are talking here about the difference between an open hand and a clenched fist.  The open hand is what Jesus presents to Thomas, when he shows himself at last, and Thomas understands that it is the hand of God.  This is a God who is not afraid of conflict, but lets us doubt, and disbelieve, and probe the painful places where the mere idea of God is not enough.  And if we don’t give up, but keep working through the conflict, a time comes when we find we are touching a living body. 
Our community is that body, a crucified body, risen out of conflict, bearing wounds.  And with that resurrection we were also given the Spirit of forgiveness, the power to make peace, to heal betrayal and come to trust each other again.  There is no more important work for us than to learn to use that gift.  Because it wasn’t given for our enjoyment, so we could congratulate ourselves on what a nice, warm, happy family we’ve become.  It was given to us as a mission; it is the Spirit in which we’ve been sent.      

Tuesday, May 24, 2016

The Joy of Being Wrong




Some of my most satisfying moments as a pastor and a priest—or as a husband and a father, for that matter—come when the people around me find a solution to a problem for which I can take no credit.  I might have helped facilitate investigation of the matter, offered some clarifying analysis or fruitful question, but I have held myself back from providing what I think to be the answer, and in the end this proves to be a good thing, when I discover that I had wrong idea.  The insight that comes, the sense of the right direction forward is one I would not have come up with.  And the satisfaction of recognizing it when it comes, the energy I receive from being able to join in to saying “yes, that’s it”, is far greater than what I would have gained by insisting we try it my way.
This is what you might call “The Joy of Being Wrong.” Which is a phrase I got from the title of a book by an English Catholic theologian named James Allison.  I wouldn’t necessarily recommend you read the book, unless you’re in the mood for a good, brisk, philosophical and theological workout, but you don’t really have to, because the title tells you most of what you need to know.  Which is that the joy that is at the heart of the Christian life, the joy that burst with the brilliance of a billion suns from the empty tomb on Easter Day, and still spreads contagiously around the world almost two thousand years later, is the joy of being wrong. 
Of course, the Judeo-Christian sense of being wrong, is more far-reaching and profound than simply not knowing the right solution to a practical problem in the affairs of one’s family or the church.  The subtitle of Allison’s book is “Original Sin through Easter Eyes.”  And it isn’t only Roman Catholics who subscribe to the notion that there is something essentially, you might even say congenitally, off-the-mark in human nature.  “I have been a sinner from my mother’s womb” says Psalm 51.  Orthodox Calvinism teaches the doctrine of “total human depravity,” which is reflected in the General Confession from the original English Book of Common Prayer: “We have left undone those things which we ought to have done; And we have done those things which we ought not to have done; And there is no health in us.”
This wrongness is not merely psychological, but is manifested in the social world we have made.  The Cross of Christ reveals this.  The powers that rule this world are unmasked on the cross as the powers of sin and death.  It is a world constructed on the victimization of the innocent, on violence and falsehood pretending to be justice and peace.    And this is reflected in the lesser instruments of death we wield against each other daily in our intimate circles—the hardened heart and the cold shoulder, the accusing finger, the sugary lips concealing a poisoned tongue, the deaf ear and the blind eye.   We are wrong when we think that our justifications, be they personal or cultural, religious or political, can make such things pleasing to God.  We are wrong to believe that a world so in thrall to the power of death is a world that can last. 
  
But Christ’s resurrection shows how wrong we also are when imagine we are helpless prisoners of that world, or that our deep-dyed implication in its wrongness is a stain which cannot be removed.  The Easter joy of being wrong is the freedom of seeing that there is no captivity in sin, in self-destructive vice or self-righteous injustice, in death itself, that cannot be broken open by the love and life of God.   The story of Saul of Tarsus on the road to Damascus is the classic Biblical account of this truth.  Phrases from the story, such as “road to Damascus” itself, and “the scales fell from his eyes,” have entered the English language as proverbial expressions for the moment of amazing grace.  And the irony that the Lord Jesus should appear to this man, who has committed all his considerable talents to stamping out the name of Jesus from the earth, and should call him to make that name known to the nations, was not lost on Paul himself.  It became, in some sense, the core of his message, a compelling illustration of the power of the crucified and risen Christ to break down the best-defended barriers of bigotry, arrogance, and ignorance and create a new humanity in God.
But what is sometimes overlooked is that this is not only the story of the conversion of Paul, but is also about God’s call to a disciple in Damascus called Ananias.  The Lord said to him in a vision, "Ananias." He answered, "Here I am, Lord,” which is the standard Biblical literary form for the calling of a prophet.  And what Ananias is called to do is to complete the transforming action of Christ’s grace by ministering to Paul.  To do this he has to overcome his own well-founded suspicion of this man and his motives.  He has to move from the posture of traumatized victim to that of the agent of healing forgiveness.  He has to take a risky further step in trusting the transforming power of resurrection, in opening himself to the joy of being wrong.
We can see a similar vision in the 21st Chapter of John.  When Jesus asks Peter three times, “Do you love me?” it is an unmistakable reminder of the night he was betrayed, when they asked Peter three times if he knew Jesus and he denied it.  The risen Christ comes to Peter and gives him the chance for a "do-over," to declare three times not only that he knows Jesus but that he loves him.  It hurts Peter’s feelings, but it also helps him to release his guilt and to embrace the magnificence of his mission.  It reminds of his cowardice, so he can take a stand in his courage.  It reminds him of his faithlessness, so he can step forward in faith.  It reminds him of his refusal, so he can be whole-hearted in his acceptance.  And what is he accepting but a commission to do what Jesus himself has done—to be a shepherd, to feed the flock of the Messianic community with words of life and acts of healing and compassion.

In the same way, the dynamic of our Christian ministry is always simultaneously giving and receiving forgiveness, feeding and being fed.  We do not hold ourselves apart from the sin and suffering that are the common lot of humanity.  We do not pretend that the world is other than that it is, or wish to escape to a private island of material privilege or spiritual transcendence.  We engage with the real stuff of life—which is why stories of resurrection in the New Testament so often involve the sharing of food.  But we do so with a very particular perspective, one that is more of an open inquiry, a wondering, than it is a prescription or a dogma.  It’s a questioning that flows from the knowledge that we are certainly wrong: And so we ask--how could God be present in these circumstances?  What possibility of healing and transformation is here that Christ can see, even if we can’t?  Where are we blocking the energy of love, that could create something new out of this mess?  And what might we say or do, to release the flow, so that we nourish, rather than slaughter, Jesus' lambs?
The breaking of bread which the collect for this Sunday speaks about, the breaking of bread in which we recognize the presence of the risen Christ, is not bread we break for ourselves, but bread broken for us by a stranger, a stranger we are always only just beginning to know.  His is the body that was broken on the cross, that is still broken every day in the victims of our greed, fear, hate, and indifference—and at the same time it is the bread of life.  We do not simply see this broken bread, we break it to share it, to take it into ourselves—it is the food of our redemption and forgiveness.  It nourishes us with the faith and hope and love that animated Jesus, the faith and hope and love of God for the world.  It sends us out to minister to that world in the joy of being wrong, bearing in our bodies both the death of Christ, and the glory of his resurrection, and it opens our eyes to see both cross and resurrection there.


About Me

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Petaluma, California, United States
I am a priest in the Episcopal Church, and have been (among other things) an organic farmer and gardener, and a Zen monk. I have a lifelong interest in social and spiritual renewal on the basis of contemplative discipline, creative nonviolence, and ecological practice. In recent years my work has focused intensely on the responsibility of pastoral ministry in the humanistic, evangelical, and catholic branch of Christianity known as Anglicanism. I'm married with a daughter, and have three brothers and two parents.